Why in some Siddurim after the marital duties, it is written that we should throw a little bit of water on the floor, next to the bed?

In continuation with related material to Sod HaZivug, Kabbalah brings that, “When one has eaten and is satisfied in a seudah, it is necessary to give the scraps and the dregs to the sitra achra, and any particles left upon the hands after a meal must be washed away [with the water called mayin achronim] so that the ‘other side’ may receive its due. Therefore the washing of the hands after a meal is an imperative duty [in order to avoid the ‘tribulations’ of the sitra achra. See Kaf HaChayim Sofer 181:8] and the water must be poured away into an appropriate place” (Zohar II:154b, Terumah; Talmud, Chulin 105a-b).

Now, the negative spiritual element that seeks to ruin man through constantly seducing him sexually to procreate (from the zera levatalah, as already explained) its progeny of shedim, and “who lives in the depth of the great abyss of the ocean… is a certain hot fiery female spirit named Lilit y’s“ (Zohar III:19a, Vayikra). If man hears the Torah’s pronouncement, Kedoshim tihiyu, Be holy!, and treat the sexual act with his wife with awe of G-d, this most destructive of spirits does not have authorization to come close and injure, chaz v’shalom, this man and his loved ones - for it is hindered by three malachim. However, if the man is in fact seduced to stray off the praiseworthy path of the L-ord, “then, as a fool, he comes close to her [Lilit y’s]. She dresses with jewelry like an abominable prostitute, hugs and kisses him, and serves him wine filled with dregs and the remains of the Serpent’s venom. And when she sees him desiring her and moving away from the path of truth, she removes all of her adornments she worn for him… She then leaves him sleeping and goes up High in order to denounce and accuse him, so as to receive permission to destroy him. The fool then awakens, thinking he will have her again with all of his pleasurable fancies, but he sees her without her sweet vestments, for now she has become a powerful oppressor dressed in a hot and fiery garment, causing this fool great terror to the whole of his body and soul. This oppressor has terrible eyes, and a sharp sword with drops of venom dripping from it… She kills the fool and throws him in Gehinom” (Zohar I:148a-b, Sitrei Torah).

As such, it is vital to know that Lilit y”s is always on the look out wishing to damage the world, seducing the ego of men with the illusion of our material existence. In fact, even when man unites with his wife in holiness to procreate, it is necessary to know the “medicine” to ward off this shed from any opportunity to bring harm, chaz v’shalom. In a low tone and “with the heart devout to Hashem, should the mane pronounce [in Aramaic]: Atifa be’kitefa izdamnat, sha’arei sha’arei, lah tiol ve’lah tinpok, la didan ve’lah be’advan. Tuv tuv, iamah it’reguisha, galgaloi lin karan, be’chulakah kadisha achidnah bikdusha de’malka it’atafna. ‘He who is covered by a sheet [to wit, Lilit y’s, who is always covered and wailing, for the name Lilit y’s is derived from crying, in Hebrew, yelalah] is here. Go far away from me, go far away from me. Ye shall not enter nor leave. This is not yours, nor does it belong to your portion. Return, return, the waters revolt, its waves expect you back. I connect to the holy portion. I am covered with the holiness of the King’. The man should cover his and his wife’s head for a short period, and then they should unite. After the act, it is necessary to spill a bit of water around the bed. This is the best protection” (Zohar III:19a, Vayikra), since it is as much her barrier and her portion! It is her mayin achronim. In this way, man ensures that she will only take the drops of water, but not the “drops of life” (i.e., the vital and creative force of semen).

So what is the severity of the sin of Mishkav Zachur (homossexualism)?

It is written regarding the creation of Adam and Chava: Vayeva­rech otam vayikra et shemam Adam, “He blessed them, and called their name Adam [man]” (Bereshit 5:2). Torah is very clear to reveal that G-d called them ‘both’ Adam. In this way, He established that the spiritual nature of a human being is only completed in the world through the union of the ‘two distinct human aspects’, to wit, the masculine (corresponding to the active spiritual force and of expansion), and the feminine (corresponding to the passive spiritual force and of restriction). These spiritual forces embodied in the human being – and that exhibit such opposing functions – when united in the sanctified manner, form a ‘well balanced physical-spiritual pair’. This means a single being mirroring his origen in one common soul before its descent to this world and division into sexes. In fact, through this balance, flow all Divine blessings to the couple; and the whole world benefits from this most pleasing of unions in Shamayin. And as it is written, “When a couple lives in accordance to Torah law, the forces of Creation – the letters Yud and Hei from the holy Tetragram – reside with them. Then, in time, they become the image of the holy forces of Creation” (Tikunei Zohar, Tikun 10b). And it is also written that, “Who is incomplete below [i.e., not married] remains incomplete on high [i.e., spiritually]… And Ya’acov [the perfect patriarch]...alo, until his marriage was not complete” (Zohar I:150a, Vayetze).

Now, our Sages, all of blessed memory, have openly cautioned us: Kedoshim tihiyu hevu persuhim min ha-arayot u-min ha-evera, “Distance yourself from the illicit relations and from sin” (Rashi at the beginning of Parashat Kedoshim). And “of all isurei ha’arayot, only regarding the avon [sin] of Mishkav Zachur the Torah uses twice the word Toeva [Vayikra 18:22]. The Talmud explains that Toeva is Toe Hu Ba, which means that ‘he is making a mistake in this’… That is, ‘this’ is against human nature! It is the type of avon that exists only to challenge G-d. It is something that comes from the anger which feeds this abominable rebelliousness” (R’ Moshe Feinstein z”l, Teshuvah, Chelek 4 siman 115). And the Torah is also quite clear regarding the grave punishments of these forbidden unions, including that which occurs to the person committing these transgressions after he dies. The mekubal, HaRav Yehudah Fatiyah zt”l, the greatest student of the Ben Ish Hai, in his Sefer Minchat Yehudah describes his many conversations with tormented ruchot (spirits) which commited these abominations in life. They relate with terror the severity of their spiritual punishments! After all, not only from this transgression’s zera levatalah the sitra achra gets nourished and demoniacal beings are brought to life, but also each drop of semen spilled in vain implicates on the destruction of potential (unborn) children, which become imprisoned in the clutches of the klipot. Moreover, the ejaculated semen in a domain ‘absolutely improper’ deflowers these poor souls in a most perverse and horrible manner! Contrary to an union between man and wife which fulfills the mitzvah of procreation and gives the fruits of children y”h, if oral sex occurs in this sin, chaz v’shalom, then the only thing fulfilled are the spiritual deaths of the children which are as if “swallowed” in this most merciless abomination! Yet, regarding these rebellious ones, all members of the Erev Rav, it is written: “They all alike have broken the yoke, and burst the bonds… a wolf… shall destroy them… because their transgressions are many, and their apostasies are great” (Yermiyah HaNavi 5:5-6). Additionally: “The wicked with their sins pollute both themselves and the Sanctuary [i.e., they contaminate the earth], and bring a ruach rah [an unclean spirit] upon themselves; but in time to come G-d will purify Israel and remove from them the unclean spirit” (Zohar III:54a, Metzora). This ruach rah is the wicked Nebuchanetser, “who was deprived of his kingdom and he dwelt with the beasts of the field, his human countenance was taken away from him and from that day he did not bear the impress of a man” (Zohar II:125b, Mishpatim) – and was only to bear the image of a wolf! And as it is known, “Nebuchanetser used to tear the flesh of a live rabbit and eat it” (Eicha Rabah 2:14), and Kabbalah says that, “He who has homosexual relations is reincarnated as a rabbit” (the Ari”zal, Sha’ar HaGilgulim, Hakdamah 22, end).

Each and everyone who is involved in this most grievous of sins must use all of his kochot ha-nefesh (spiritual forces) to do teshuvah and implore Hashem’s mercy.

What are Arayot?

As we have treated the fundamental subject of zera levatalah, it becomes equally important to understand a whole area of greatly damaging behavior in which zera levatalah is “only” the final transgression. This is the area called in Torah, arayot. Let us explore it and related subjects.

Among various subjects, the parshiot Achare Mot and Kedoshim treat one, which is absolutely vital for the person seeking kedusha and distance from tumah, the essence of fulfilling the Divine injunction of Kedoshim tihiyu (Be Holy). We are speaking of the laws against the forbidden expressions of sexuality. These illicit activities are generally called Arayot. Although commonly translated as incest, the Torah definition of this subject is different from the contemporary vision. In fact, there are various “sexual unions” absolutely forbidden by Torah law, such as a man with a nidah (a woman during her menstrual cycle, and until she goes to the mikveh), all homosexual relationships and of bestiality, as well as incest and illicit relationships described in these parshiot. All of these arayot are considered by Divine law as belonging to the same exact category and degree of tumah as the idolatrous rituals used to sacrifice children to profane and inferior entities (see Vayikra 18:21, 20:2-5). That is why spiritual law declares: “The souls who commit these abominations shall be cut off from among their people” (Vayikra 18:29). It is noteworthy that all arayot, being one of the cardinal sins, are on par with both murder and idolatry - transgressions for which we are required to give up our lives rather than transgress. Moreover, Chazal explains in a most unquestionable manner that “the essential condition for sanctification is that the person must necessarily be distant from the arayot” (Rashi no Vayikra 19:1). And as it is esoterically known, “the objective of Creation is a dira b’tachtonim, a term explaining that Hashem created the world for He desired to have an abode in the lower worlds” (Midrash Tanchuma, Naso §16). This objective of Creation is only reached through the ‘sanctification of the world’, that is, through the efforts of man in Torah and mitzvot. It follows that, the transgression of arayot not only implies in a most intense degree of impurity and direct connection to the klipot and sitra achra, but these types of illicit relationships have cosmic implications as well, to wit, bringing severe dinim to the world and vivifying the negative forces, chaz v’shalom. The path of kedusha imposes a true distancing from all impurities and abominations for the soul, and in fact, impels the ultimate transformation of this evil in good. This occurs through the exclusive establishment of ‘Torah sanctioned relationships’, which bring man and the world the Divine shefa – the brachot from Hashem. Furthermore, it is only through kedusha that Mashiach will come, may it be soon, amen.